Did you see the Brené Brown #BrenéBrown “Call to Courage” video on Netflix? It’s about vulnerability, courage, and risk taking. When’s the last time you took a risk? How did it turn out?
I taught a workshop this week on learning from failure or failing forward. We talked about difficult situations that had unexpected benefits. I had plenty of examples. I thought getting divorced would be catastrophic, but I’m so much happier now. I’ve lost many jobs, but almost always landed in better ones. I’ve led projects that failed, but I learned lessons about leadership and how my attitude impacted the outcomes.
Now that I’m older, I can see that some of “my mistakes” came from passive-aggressive behavior when I was unhappy with someone or the organization. Too bad that I lacked the maturity to see what I was doing at the time.
Mistakes cause us to reflect. They give us feedback about our lives. We learn and grow…and become more mature. I hate to think where I would be now if I hadn’t taken some risks and made lots of mistakes.
My girlfriend just called to tell me that she’s worried because her daughter is moving to Los Angeles on her own; she’s leaving the college town she’s lived in since college graduation. L.A. is the perfect place for the young woman to pursue her career, but it also takes courage to leave friends and family behind. Her family may feel she’s making a mistake, but this is how she’ll grow and mature.
My girlfriend’s boyfriend plans to remodel is bathroom, but he’s afraid he’ll use the wrong tiles or paint color so he’s procrastinating. We all do this to some degree. We wait and wait for inspiration or certainty. I’m learning that if I make a mistake, I can usually fix it. It might take time and money, but it’s better than taking no action.
Where have you been procrastinating? Now is the time to move forward. If you need support, let me know.
Take a chance. I want to hear how it goes.
I am a believer in positive thinking. I’m also a believer in being realistic. What this means is that even if you have a clear goal, you still need to rationally assess your current situation and readiness to attain the goal.
In my coaching practice I talk to people in their 60’s and 70’s who want to return to full-time work in the profession they had in their 50’s. Some of my clients are successful at “going back,” especially if they work in healthcare where seniors are often hired. On the other hand, an honest discussion often reveals that a backup plan or a modified goal will lead to a better outcome. Here’s what I mean:
Suppose David, who is 70, wants to return to full-time corporate training. We will talk about David’s health and energy level, since the employer will look at this. We will discuss David’s plan for staying up-to-date on corporate training needs and strategies. For example, which online software programs is he skilled at using for developing training? Does David need additional training to be competitive? We need to consider David’s networking contact list. What is David’s communication and marketing strategy?
I can help David prepare for the job search, but I need David to be clear and honest about his goal. Is he truly healthy enough for full-time work? Is he still mentally sharp? Will his current skills allow him to “talk the talk” of younger and “up-to-date” colleagues? How well does he work with younger people? Has David maintained his professional contacts, and, if not, how can he build new ones?
During an honest discussion, if David says that his health is not optimal, and his skill level is not where it was, then David and I can explore suitable goals. For example, perhaps David can enhance his skills and then work part-time for established training companies that use hourly or daily contractors. Depending on his interests, perhaps David can develop his own training programs and market them through social media. David could reengage with professional and networking groups.
There are many possible goals and next steps. The key is to be honest about the current situation. Working with a coach can help you move from hopeful, positive thinking to realistic thinking that results in positive outcomes.