Lately friends have been asking me about my philosophy. They want to know if I have a dogma, or if I’m guided by a self-help guru. The answer is I’m a pragmatist. Over the years, through trial and error, I’ve found a path that works for me. It includes having a balanced life, getting unstuck, pursuing fun leisure activities, keeping healthy, fulfilling my life purpose, sticking to my personal guiding principles, and achieving goals.
In my workshops and coaching, I share this “path” with others. And that feels great. So, as Thanksgiving approaches, I want to talk about how grateful I am to have this opportunity to teach and be a coach. It truly is fulfilling to help people who are feeling uncertain about what next steps to take, and then see them leave at peace, knowing how they want life to look and what they need to do to achieve it.
This work, plus so much more, makes me feel that my life is balanced and full. I am thankful for good health which allows me to enjoy hiking, skiing, cycling, sailing, dance, and yoga. I’m thankful for the amazing friends I’ve made while pursuing these activities. I’m grateful that as a Marin Master Gardener, I can volunteer for the Dig It, Grow It, Eat It program that teaches children about gardening and nutritious foods. I’m thankful that I’m able to travel; this year I went to the East Coast and Canada, while next year I’ll visit New Zealand. And I’m grateful for my small family.
I want to wish you a fulfilling Thanksgiving Holiday. If you have time, write down some of the things you are grateful for. Did you know that a 2012 study found that grateful people have fewer aches and pains and report feeling healthier than other people? Spend 10 minutes jotting down a few grateful thoughts before bed, and you may sleep better.
These photos say it all. Hiking in the Canadian Rockies and Purcell Mountains in British Columbia is awe-inspiring. I came home feeling joyful and grateful, but tired. It’s hard to top spending a week with dear friends from my hiking club surrounded by spectacular scenery. We hiked, drove, cooked and stayed together in a big barn. The encouragement and support of the group made it possible to hike 10 to 12 miles a day on steep switchbacks climbing up over 2500 feet.
One of my friends fell and broke her arm. Undeterred – with her arm in a cast – she made it to the summit of every trail we took. Very inspiring. And by the way, our group has hikers in their 50s, 60s and mid-70s.
If you can, get outdoors into the beauty of nature. Your soul will respond to seeing wildflowers, waterfalls, meadows and forests. Take a walk under trees or near water. You’ll clear your mind and feel fabulous.
Following are some of the topics we discuss in the Reinvent Yourself after 50 workshops. See how many of these tips you can incorporate into your life. Let me know which ones are helping you feel greater joy and fulfillment.
Explore subjects that interest you and see where it leads. Read, use Google, take workshops, attend lectures.
Have a Supportive Community
We all need community. Studies show you’ll live longer and feel better if you have a good social life. Meet people who lift you up and spend time with them. I’ve found that Meetup.com is a good way to meet who enjoy the activities that you enjoy.
Live a Balanced Life
You will be happier if you find the right balance of work (paid or volunteer), relationships, leisure, creativity, learning, and spiritual pursuits. What do you need more of? What do you need less of in life?
Leisure is a vital part of living a balanced life. Take time to relax and recharge. Your brain requires this.
Get outside as often as possible. The sun, greenery and water are all nurturing. My yellow, green and blue logo symbolizes these essential elements of nature.
Be Healthy – stay active and eat well
Exercise releases endorphins which make you feel good. You’ll feel better and be healthier if you keep moving and eat healthy foods (and never smoke).
Each day write down a few of the things you’re grateful for. When you see the good in the world, you feel happier. It’s that simple.
Keep a Bucket List
Pay attention to your ideas about things you’d like to do. (Sometimes feeling jealous of others is an indication of something we need or want to do.) People who write down and follow-up on their bucket lists are more likely to fulfill their dreams. Create a life you’ll love.
New places and cultures (even if they are close to home) introduce us to new ideas and perspectives. Travel beyond your usual stomping ground to feel inspired and energized.
Feel Passion and Purpose
Find time for activities that make a difference to others. This work will add meaning and purpose to your own life.
My friend Harry was laid off from his job at the age of 64. He took some time to think about his future….and then took some more time. His savings were slim, so he said he would look for another job. I’m not sure if he looked. I do know that he spent a lot of time on his computer, going to movies by himself, and watching TV. Mostly he was alone. Then he got sick. Then his cognitive thinking declined. He was depressed and isolated. He is one of the reasons I created the “Reinvent Yourself after 50” workshop. I want to help people feel fulfilled, joyful, and passionate, whether they are working or not.
For many people the most difficult aspect of leaving the workforce is losing daily interaction with work colleagues and the people you meet when you’re at work – the coffee barista, the bus driver, the cashier at the deli. In the workshop we discuss the many benefits of social integration and how to ensure we don’t lose it. This video demonstrates why our relationships are paramount to our longevity and to having fulfilling lives.
What does it take to live for 100 years? These are the surprising predictors of a long, healthy life.
Susan Pinker at TED2017 – The secret to living longer may be your social life